FEEDING SWINE THE MODERN WAY

feeding_swine_282.jpg
feeding_swine_282.jpg

FEEDING SWINE THE MODERN WAY

5.00

#00282/Greeting Card (6.25" x 4.5") - Blank

THE MODERN WAY: First, plop him at the kitchen table. Second, arrange his right elbow on table; lift right arm.  Now, form his hand into a fist. Insert the syrup dispenser in the fist.  Next, arrange his left arm by bending into a 90 degree angle. Form hand into fist. Place fist, thumb facing up, on table. Insert fork in fist.  Place butter and coffee within easy reach and within his direct line of sight.  Place flapjacks on plate and move plate back and forth in front of him. Coo some twaddle such as “Yummmmm. Pancakes! Your favorite!”  Let him pour his own syrup, but be careful he doesn't spill any on his sweater. Let him cut his own mouthfuls, but be sure he puts them in his mouth and not on his sweater. Be sure to take fork away when he's finished eating.   If he still won't leave, wash plate and start all over again.  Repeat until he either goes to his crappy job or falls asleep.

Quantity:
Add To Cart